1. Be Grateful

"If you cannot be grateful for what you have received, then be thankful for what you have been spared."

This might be the most popular tip to a happy life, but that doesn't lessen the value of this rule. How to be grateful? Often times we got so caught up with how busy life is and our ambitions and our dreams as well as our schedules. Too often when we wake up, we start our day by stressing over "What should I do today? What am I supposed to finish today?" Instead, let's start our day by thinking about all things we should be thankful for yesterday, and being grateful that we have another day. At night too, before we go to sleep, it's good to reflect back about what happened in that day and be grateful. Have a childlike spirit, who often able to be thankful and be happy over little things.

2. See the Light in People

"We judge ourselves by our intentions and others by their behaviour." (Stephen M. R. Covey)

It's often that we feel hurt or mistreated by others action or behaviour, but when people were upset because of us, we claimed that we didn't do it on purpose and therefore refuse to be blamed. I think we would have a better life, when we can see the light in people. When we choose to focus on people's good side or kindness, and able to tolerate their weakness instead of expecting them to change, life would be happier.

3. Forgive and Forget

"Holding onto anger is like holding onto an anchor, if you don't let it go, you'll drown."

Forgive people even when they are not sorry, and try our best to forget about their mistake. It doesn't mean that we keep suppressing our anger inside, because it would hurt even bigger and this could lead to an even bigger kind of anger in the future. However, learn to channel it the right way. Learn to transform the anger into something good, and express it only when we are sure it is used for improvement, and both sides learn something, instead of just venting our anger. When it is done, it's done. Keep remembering about someone's bad side will just consumes us from the inside.

4. Keep Your Eyes on the Prize

"Don't be pushed by your problems, be led by your dreams." (Ralph Waldo Emerson)

Learn to focus on something that we can gain in the end, or what we can gain throughout the process. People seldom choose things to do or profession based on what they are passionate about, often it is chosen out of fear or just avoiding the risk. Often what happen are people become unwilling to try to do or see new things, because they think that it will not be worth it, when they haven't even try.

5. Positivity

"A negative mind will never brings you positive life"

When we spend all of our time to think and see the negative side, our brain tends to get accustomed to it, and it will soon become a habit, then a character. It may lead to inability of seeing the "bright colorful" side of life, but instead the "dark bitter" side of life. This will not only affect us, but will affect our response towards others as well, therefore affecting our relationships and how we socialize with others. Surely this will not lead us a to good and happy life, right?

"Integrity is doing the right thing, even when no one is watching."

During my new life as a junior in university, I've learned a lot more about the world outside. Being an alumni from an international school, got me used to having a freedom to speak out my ideas, as well as having equality both between senior and juniors; in terms of respect as well as treatment. The world outside (or probably just in Indonesia) however, is different.

As I am currently now preparing for my orientation camp, so far what I learnt is that mistake is equal to punishment. As well as I-do-not-care-how-you-find-it-just-do-it. As well as little things like pun is not meant to be fun.

I wish I could learn a far more better or wiser things though. Unfortunately, nowadays it doesn't go that way. One example is that how we all will get punished if we did a mistake. I don't think this way will resulted in making a person better, or more perfect. We aren't flawless, and yes it's human to do some mistake sometimes. In fact we can learn from our mistake and do better. But with this punishment system, we didn't avoid mistake because we think it is not the right thing to do. We avoid mistake because we didn't want to be punished. And sadly, this is how our future generation is shaped.

That's why people cheat if they have the chance, because as long as they don't get caught they will not be punished. That's why people crossed the red light, because as long as there are no police around they won't have to be responsible. That's why people do bad things when nobody is around, because as long as they maintain good attitude in front of others they will still be loved.

And probably, avoiding punishment is the only principle of living to some human nowadays, without even considering about integrity.



- Caroline Ongkowijoyo